Simplified Answering

No matter how well we think we are prepared, our seemingly clear message will become changed. Make no mistake. The receiver has the power of communication. We control everything until the words leave our mouth.

Then we have absolutely no control… not over how the message is received, not over whether it was received correctly, not over how our message is decoded and not over how other will react.

What we can control, however, is ourselves… how we deliver the message, how we interpret the mood and situation of the other parties, and so on. The better we control ourselves in what we say, what we do, how we say it and how we do it…the more we can positively influence that which we cannot control.

One of the reasons we spent so much time on building our listening muscles is that we now have the advantage of using some of those muscles again. The only difference now is that we are going to use them for answering.

With Simplified Answering, “Less is more”. How little can we say to fully answer the question? We already discussed the notion that if someone rambles, is non-descript or can’t use simple terms to relate his or her position, there is a good chance that person isn’t fully prepared or sufficiently knowledgeable.

The same applies to us. If we can’t present our facts and explain our position in clear, simple, common sense terms, we haven’t sufficiently done our homework and are not ready to negotiate. The more we babble, the less credible we become.

One way to keep ourselves easily understood is to not talk about too much at the same time. We want to identify and isolate each component of our position, addressing each one separately and completely. What we are doing is compartmentalizing; and we can’t do that unless we totally know our stuff.

Saying less or keeping it simple does not mean withholding or concealing information. It means answering one specific question or addressing one specific issue, but not answering or addressing anything else until asked or questioned. That alone significantly reduces the risk of misinterpretation.

Remember, the way we take in information listening to a presentation is different to how we take in information when we are actually questioning or challenging someone.

So we want to avoid phrases like “…which leads me to my next point…” after having answered a question. First, we don’t have to defend or justify when and why we are making our next point. Second, we need to give the other party time to disengage the targeted questioning mode of thinking and return to an open information-gathering mentality.  

A quick “Do you have more questions on this point?” is really all that is necessary for the other party to switch gear.

Also, we want to resist the temptation of guessing why someone else asks a question. It’s really none of our business. There could be any number of reasons somebody asks a question. Trying to guess why starts us down that slippery slope of misinterpretation, or even suspicion.

We don’t anticipate. We don’t judge motives. We don’t assume what the other party does or doesn’t know and we don’t answer anything beyond precisely what is asked. There will be time for all that later.